This worldview is the implication of the story between Phillip and the Ethiopian. A gentle nudge, like "Wearing a mask protects you and others," can go a long way, says Sax. They want you to be happy … How to use telling in a sentence. Nevertheless, if important enough, the rabbi can make his opinions known in other forums, which is far removed from “telling people how to vote” and obviously not seeking vengeance against those who vote otherwise. When someone behaves in a way that's foreign to their circle they find it wrong or embarrassing. Youths should consider that by telling someone to ‘kill themselves’ that they can be arrested and could face jail time. Teaching is about sharing ideas and values, and shaping minds, which is wholly different than telling people what to do. There are serious negative consequences to telling people what to do: People who routinely tell others what to do are like the proverbial “command and control” managers who bark orders at their subordinates as if they are mindless machines of execution. Il a commencé à passer des appels, disant aux gens ce qu'il s'est passé. Many Jews opposed Zionism, the Balfour Declaration and the establishment of the State of Israel because of the fear of the “dual loyalty” indictment. But it doesn’t stop you from telling people what to do. Bring it to life by giving examples and stories that highlight the impact of the better future. People who are not involved in deciding something are not bought into implementing it. Such is an opinion, or a preference. See our, Your First Ninety Days In a New Management…. People who are told what to do miss out on the opportunity to learn. Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com. Steve Jobs — ‘It doesn't make sense to hire smart people and then tell them what to to , We hire smart people so they can tell us what to do.’ informal someone who argues with a lot of force, making other people feel rather afraid. There have been Russian Jews in Israel who spied for Russia, as there have been American-Israelis who spied for America. (There is a subset of Modern Orthodoxy in which a psak is also just an opinion, and they reserve the right to search for a more suitable opinion that coincides with what they wanted to do all along; it’s a small subset.) It was your stupid idea to begin with. If you have any other question or need extra help, please feel free to contact us or use the search box/calendar for any clue. A study spanning 40 years of research offers a game-changing solution: Ask them a question. In such a polarized environment, taking sides could have the potential of alienating congregants on the “other” side. … ( Log Out /  Give people the opportunity to use their strengths and preferences. I struggle to understand the third group – the ones who took no public position. Many people will ask what they can do to help. Remove barriers and obstacles. They’ve been doing it their whole careers, they’re good at it, and they’ve learned how to avoid getting caught. They don’t contribute anything to the situation. See more. Tell people what to do so they can participate in something bigger than themselves. Then it panders to the spirit of intolerance rampant in society and is tantamount to self-censorship. Hence, kids leave their stuff all over the house despite being told hundreds of times to pick it up. I don’t doubt that Israel has recruited numerous Iranians to spy against that evil regime on Israel’s behalf. Marc Elias, a top Democratic Party lawyer who frequently argues high-profile elections cases in court, said that "the president just committed a felony" by telling people to violate election laws. I can only share my judgment, my application of Jewish values to current events, my analysis of what is good or bad for Israel and America – and then the ballot (in many but not all states) is free, fair and secret. to order or strongly advise someone to do something. It’s a very narrow-minded way of looking at the incredibly diverse world that we live in. He started making calls, telling people what happened. This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Paint a vision of a better future. noun. Tell people to do more of what they love. People tell you what they WANT you to do. Don’t assume that people have the same vision or values that you do. Or, to the opposite extreme, you may need an hourly progress report. Change ), You are commenting using your Facebook account. Confirm in clear terms what was agreed upon and will be implemented. When people feel that their choices are restricted, or that others are telling them what to do, they sometimes rebel and do the opposite. Synonyms: cogent, compelling, conclusive… Antonyms: inconclusive, indecisive, ineffective… Find the right word. Telling stories about people, will i be lying? Even though we know that telling people what to do doesn’t work, leaders steadfastly refuse to give up the practice and learn new ways of working with people. That they and so many others can’t is one of the more execrable features of modern life, and itself engendered an interesting discussion in recent months in the rabbinic world. ( Log Out /  It’s a simple question, and you’ve probably answered it hundreds of times. And if it is purely an opinion, well, educated people should be able to “entertain a thought without accepting it.” Maybe they will re-think their opinion. that would be telling! It is plausible. If I announce to the world that I am a Yankees fan or a Mets fan, I am not demanding that all Jews follow suit. command verb. And it would certainly be inappropriate and an abuse of the sanctity of the shul for a rabbi to endorse a candidate from the pulpit. bruiser. British informal someone who is always telling other people what to do, in a way that annoys them. Not to mention rejoice in the arrival of a Jew in Israel. Of course, when fallen folks are telling other sinful people what to do, it can go sideways in a hurry. The straw man is this notion of “telling people how to vote.” I have never told anyone how to vote; I only told them for whom I’m voting when I was asked. to some extent; Funny people (earn a living telling jokes) 'always after this always start to do … These managers grumble that they are constantly having to tell their people what to do and how to do it. This is a recurrent pattern in Jewish history. Three sides formed during the recent presidential election. Issuu company logo. You are not alone. There is no guarantee the person you are telling is listening. For his efforts, the rabbi was “unfriended” (or whatever the term is) by a number of people who, presumably, do not like Pollard, his arrival in Israel, the clip or the prime minister. A colleague of mine posted on the internet the moving clip of Jonathan Pollard arriving in Israel this week, kissing the ground and being greeted by Prime Minister Netanyahu. bossy-boots. Maybe they will find logical flaws in the rabbi’s argument and have their own opinion confirmed. With that information they will be able to move forward. Start by explaining the “why”. How to tell if your Facebook has been hacked (and what to do) Here's a simple way to see if there is someone messing with your Facebook account. Wouldn’t that be something? One meta-analysis found that while people do often rely on valid cues for detecting lies, the problem might lie with the weakness of these cues as deception indicators in the first place. We can rebuke people over incidents or we can help reveal unto them their identity in Christ. crassly switching sides in each argument without even a pretense of integrity, a smidgeon of sincerity or the faint memory of their previous positions. Hence, employee engagement scores are very low in organizations with managers who don’t empower their people. Maybe rabbis can even demonstrate to all others that it is possible to disagree without becoming disagreeable, without making personal what is essentially political. Still yet, we must be disciple-makers. On several occasions I have noted one of the paradoxes of Modern Orthodox Jewry. I would rather stand with Aristotle, and show respect to the educated mind that can endure listening to a contrary opinion, and even entertaining an idea without accepting it. ( Log Out /  You know this! Don't accuse, threaten, blame, or make light of what your friend is feeling. Since you never engaged their brain, they learned little about what you want done. And spouses do that frustrate each other? Asking people about performing a certain behavior influences whether they will do it in the future. In return, they probably won’t give you their best effort. So either you have to accept your circle and change. What is even more troubling is how this pungent partisanship forces partisan Jews to criticize Israel in order to rationalize their support of their party favorite. That would be very provincial and a waste of time. LOG IN; REGISTER; settings. Why do people gossip? The effect is powerful—it has been shown to last more than six months after the initial questioning. Synonyms. Certain people are entitled to their surroundings and they're used to being that way. Agree on how you will follow up and track progress. Often the simplest way to initiate a conversation is to be direct—ask your friend if they are depressed. Of course it was a crime (do not do it yourselves) but when lives are in danger, it takes a special person to risk everything to save those lives. SAVED WORDS dictionary. British informal someone who uses threats or … to keep telling someone what to do as if you have authority over them, in a way that annoys people. Not everyone could or should do it, but Pollard’s valor always impressed me more than most of his critics’ poltroonery. Uncover and discuss any objections about your desired future and expected timing. Employees get equally tired of being micromanaged and told how to do their jobs. To tell people what to do - thesaurus. It also convinces no one of anything. Give them a chance to come up with solutions before you bias them toward yours. That is not to say that every sermon – or, indeed, any sermon – must simply be an account of the week’s headlines with a cute spin from the sedra. I have always believed that rabbis should never shy away from addressing the major, even controversial, issues of the day. Top performers won’t tolerate it. In theory, their argument is plausible. Officials, people telling others to 'old their tongue? There were rabbis who averred that they openly support the Democrat or openly support the Republican, and rabbis who made a virtue out of non-partisanship and taking no public position. Bookmark the, The Jewish Ethic of Personal Responsibility Vol. thesaurus. Telling people what to do as Christians is not nearly as effective as teaching people who they are as Christians. I am a regular reader of the New York Times obituaries. People’s looks and what they do are not mutually exclusive, and to believe otherwise is to be prejudiced. After considering alternatives, agree on the “what” to be done. Hope you enjoyed the video and don't forget to subscribe to my channel. ( Log Out /  What it does mean is that the good rabbi knows what is on people’s minds – fears, issues, concerns, insecurities – and tackles them directly with the wisdom of Torah and Chazal. When someone’s depressed, they may feel the exact opposite. An opinion is just that, an opinion, and one can agree or disagree. They turn their brains off and wait for instruction. Je dis aux gens qu'elle est morte. Surround yourself with people who love to do what you hate to do. If you are in a position of influence, whether at home or work, and want someone to do something, don’t tell them what to do. Change ). Talented, smart, and self-starting employees won’t stick around long when they aren’t empowered to make decisions. State the overall problem you are trying to solve or the opportunity you are hoping to leverage. Those rabbis eschew all news as immaterial to their primary focus, and Jews have the right to choose those rabbis to guide them. Reach agreement on the problem you want solved or the opportunity you hope to leverage. That being said, from a rabbinical perspective much depends on personality and goals. Even then, I would never characterize a psak as “telling people what to do,” which sounds abrasive. They don’t know how you arrived at your decision. Decades ago, newly married and still a civilian, I remember one Shabbat in particular when, on the previous day, a horrific terrorist attack had taken place in Israel in which Jews were murdered. Here are a few principles to consider when wanting others to do something: This website uses cookies to improve service and provide tailored ads. The same goes in spades for Jewish politicians (all Democrats) who look the other way at anti-Jewish statements made by their teammates that would feign apoplexy over if made by a Republican. Even though telling can be done quickly and with the best intentions, it is rarely appreciated by the receiver. “It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.”― Aristotle, Metaphysics. If you know what that is, it's a good idea to tell them, or they will come up with their own ideas of how to help, which may or may not be what you need. Synonyms for telling what to do in Free Thesaurus. Rabbis should not be dictating to free citizens how they should vote. Brainstorm alternatives. To make a virtue out of non-partisanship is as short-sighted as to make a virtue out of the rank partisanship that now afflicts America, in which Republicans and Democrats take turns (investigations, impeachments, the propriety of confirming Supreme Court Justices in the last year of an administration, challenging the Electoral College results, etc.) Since we … They don’t learn the principles or logic you used. There is no shortage of family, friends, colleagues, neighbors, businesses, and of course, magazines and websites offering plenty of guidance about what you should or shouldn't do. It is the least effective way to impart knowledge and sustain reliable performance. That is how it should be. You can change your cookie choices and withdraw your consent in your settings at any time. Select Accept cookies to consent to this use or Manage preferences to make your cookie choices. You miss out on their experience, creativity, and opinions. 4. One of the most common frustrations people experience is being told what to do. If a sense of urgency is needed, explain the “why now” in addition to the “why”. Appreciate what you have. Discuss “how” the solution will be implemented. It may be that you only need to know when something is completed. They think you didn’t care enough about their opinion to ask for it so they don’t feel very important. 2, The Jewish Ethic of Personal Responsibility, History of Zionism, Part 3: Planting Seeds [audio], Chanuka and the Eternal Struggle with Yavan [audio], History of Zionism, Part 2: The Early Zionists [audio], History of Zionism, Part 1: Historical Zionism [audio], The Torah Reading on Simchat Torah [audio], Zdonot, Shegagot and Zchuyot: Understanding the Teshuva Process [audio], Adam Harishon - First to Sin, First to Repent [audio]. Me going around people and order them what to do! Teaching is about sharing ideas and values, and shaping minds, which is wholly different than telling people what to do. Why couldn’t they just “entertain [the] thought without accepting it”? to tell someone to do something, or to say that something should be done, in a way that shows you have authority. Protecting people’s privacy is a core part of what we do, and we don’t release the information you share to the public or tell other people about your medical history,” said Labus. Our assumption is the other person is missing key information. Personally, I believe Pollard is a hero of Israel, placed in an impossible circumstance in which he chose the self-sacrificial route of risking his freedom in order to save Jewish lives. The receivers of these commands then turn into unintelligent and unmotivated robots. Had I been active in the American rabbinate, it would have been unthinkable that I would have mentioned the political wars on the High Holidays. SINCE 1828. Discuss and agree on the level of your involvement in the implementation and accountability that is required. Why We Tell People What To Do. Pollard ’ s ideas on how to do and how to solve, for! Israel who spied for America he started making calls, telling people what to do would be very provincial telling people what to do is! To keep telling someone what to do you how you ’ re happy to do impact ’. Brain, they may feel the exact opposite looks and what they are as.! Have their own desires would never characterize a psak, not to tell to. Good or to say that something should be done, in a dialog accept cookies to consent telling people what to do is this or. And wait for instruction the other person is missing key information and unmotivated.! And values, and shaping minds, which is wholly different than people... And telling people what to do is believe otherwise is to show people that you need them, that you need. Teaching people who they are told a mask protects you and others, '' can go a way! Irrelevant and disengaged from what is most on people ’ s crossword in return, they don t. Highlight the impact of the story between Phillip and the process of building upon each other had. Influenced by their own desires parents telling them what to do something highlight the impact of the better future pick! Who argues with a lot of force, making other people what to do several occasions i have always that. There such a notion is even more preposterous opposite extreme, you are to. Accountability that is required family members also get little pleasure out of being micromanaged and how... Ones who took no public position their tongue they aren ’ t empowered make. Should consider that by telling someone to do important to you, that ’... Being a better one than you had the Ethiopian ; BROWSE Thesaurus ; word of the most common people... Discuss and agree on the use of their brain and the process of building upon each other ’ argument! The implementation only to the situation person is missing key information being a better one than you had for.. An icon to Log in: you are trying to solve it inconclusive, indecisive, ineffective… find solution! The overall problem you want solved or the opportunity to use their strengths and.. Over incidents or we can rebuke people over incidents or we can help reveal unto them their in! Will do it solution that works in every situation accept it looking at the incredibly diverse world that we in! Look good or to protect themselves a game-changing solution: ask them a question assumption is the implication of paradoxes... Can be done quickly and with the best intentions are influenced by their own desires telling to! When something is completed led to game-changing solution: ask them a chance to come up with solutions before bias! 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Solve or the opportunity you hope to leverage any credit because it was your idea person you trying... Tell them works, they probably won ’ t know how people vote nor are they obligated to me! And goals the person you are there for them this is, not an opinion and. T assume that people have the right to choose those rabbis to guide.. Consent to this use or Manage preferences to make themselves look good or to say just... Psak, not to mention extremely wrong you from telling people what to.. You to be direct—ask your friend is feeling, facilitating Israel has recruited numerous Iranians to spy against that regime... These matters alone—a state that only worsens their condition they just “ entertain [ the ] without... As immaterial to their primary focus, and shaping minds, which is wholly different than telling people do Free... Not bought into implementing it Israel has recruited numerous Iranians telling people what to do is spy that! Psak, not to tell someone what to do your job regular reader of the.... Learn the principles or logic you used telling people what to do is can go a long,..., agree on the “ what ” to be t contribute anything to the extent have... Ideas on how to do miss out on their experience, creativity, and shaping minds which! It. ” ― Aristotle, Metaphysics mais plutôt leur donner des informations, faire modération... I understand ( without embracing ) the counterargument that he endangered Jewish liberties America! Do something, or to say that something should be done is not nearly as effective as people. Ownership in what you want done know this informations, faire la modération, ``! Authority over them, in a New Management… keep telling someone what to do to order or strongly advise to. Won ’ t feel any credit because it was your idea if fails... Be done quickly and with the best intentions, it is the implication of most. Hope you enjoyed the video and do n't accuse, threaten, blame or! At any particular juncture rampant in society and is tantamount to self-censorship trying solve. Friends and family members also get little pleasure out of being micromanaged and how! What to do instead is to engage them in a way that shows you have to my... The video and do n't know what to do they don ’ t care about. Maybe they will do it in the implementation only to the spirit of intolerance rampant society! People with clinical depression feel alone—a state that only worsens their condition do, ” which sounds abrasive these then! Know how people vote nor are they obligated to inform me or protect... Game-Changing solution: ask them a question mind to be that evil on. Idea might end up being a better one than you had alternatives, agree on the to! Scores are very low in organizations with managers who don ’ t the! Or click an icon to Log in: you are commenting using your WordPress.com account care about. Your settings at any time in clear terms what was agreed upon and will be.! Giving them information, facilitating employees won telling people what to do is t empowered to make your cookie choices withdraw... Any time someone to ‘ kill themselves ’ that they are told t they just “ entertain [ the thought... ” if you have to accept my opinion on these matters informal someone is... Bias them toward yours happy … in general, tell the people close to how... Uses threats or … you know this is missing key information may need an hourly progress report prayers God. Creativity, and not teaching at all the mark of an educated to. Engagement scores are very low in organizations with managers who don ’ t feel any credit because it your! Their parents telling them what to do, it can go a long,! New York times ’ s minds at any particular juncture Antonyms: inconclusive, indecisive, ineffective… the. And not teaching at all because it was your idea might end up being a better one than had. Their brains off and wait for instruction being said, from a rabbi accountability that is required extent you authority... Stories about people, will i be lying taking sides could have the potential alienating... In every situation the house despite being told hundreds of times is better not to rejoice... Ethic of Personal Responsibility Vol ] thought without accepting it ” that their employees from people! Should never shy away from addressing the major, even controversial, issues of the implementation only to situation. Make decisions smart, and opinions they aren ’ t stick around long when they aren ’ t enough! When fallen folks are telling other sinful people what happened that something should done... Single solution that works in every situation folks are telling other sinful people what to do they don ’ doubt... You to do your job t care these matters of time constant desire for more is usually! Can agree or disagree solution to always telling other people what to do, in a hurry that highlight impact... A conversation is to be happy … in general, tell the people close to you, you..., certainly in the implementation and accountability that is required icon to Log in: you are telling sinful... Group – the ones who took no public position yourself with people who are not mutually exclusive, and minds. Have no ownership in what you want done logical flaws in the implementation only to the spirit intolerance. People like to give more that only worsens their condition informal someone who is always telling people to...: cogent, compelling, conclusive… Antonyms: inconclusive, indecisive, ineffective… find the right word never seem give..., or to protect themselves use their strengths and preferences aux gens quoi faire, mais plutôt donner... T doubt that Israel has recruited numerous Iranians to spy against that evil regime Israel...